I'd verb your adjective noun, pejorative.

The Top and I were talking the other day and I mentioned that the things he says to me during sex don't do a lot for me. They're nice and all, but they don't have that undies-wettening, knee-quivering effect. He focuses on future plans/ideas (ie: chaining me to the wall at night, locking me in a chastity belt) and this turns him on and pushes him towards orgasm. Being told to orgasm also helps him, but I see that as rather domineering, exclusive of begging for him to shoot his load all over me and that sort of thing.

The Top asked me what turns me on, what speech acts push me towards orgasm, and I said "things that make me blush." He ordered me to compile a list which I have not done until now. The reason this has been so difficult is that some of these things are vague, some highly specific, I didn't know if he wanted just words, and I was nervous about doing it "wrong."

Though in retrospect it would've been better for me to simply follow the order as best I could and submit it to him, rather than spending a day being anxious about it and not completing my task. Of course, the very nature of this list, "things that make me blush," has also made it difficult to compile as the subject matter is inherently embarrassing to varying degrees.

Additionally, I feel like this is "topping from the bottom", that dreaded phrase, inducing cringes and shame. That, despite the fact that the Top told me to do this, it is inherently privileging my pleasure over his.

In no particular order, things I enjoy during sexual activity:

Being treated roughly in general, including but not limited to:
-Being slapped in the face when I'm not expecting it. That last part is important.

-Having my hair pulled, but not for awhile or it just gives me a headache. Better to yank occasionally.

-Being physically manipulated by my partner(s) to positions that suit them better. Pushed down, thrown around, held in place, turned over, etc.

-Having my nipples twisted (clamps are good!).

-Being pulled onto and off of erogenous zones. ie: pressing on the back of my head while going down, being pulled off by my hair, cock-slapped in the face a few times (doesn't matter if it's flesh or silicone), and being pulled back on.

-Feeling hands on the back of my head in general when using my mouth (ie: sucking on nipples, giving head).

-Being told to kneel and getting pissed on, including my face, but not being made to swallow. It's also nice if I'm not allowed to wash up immediately.

-Having my leash pulled, but not continuously. That gets irritating. Like the hair, better to yank occasionally or just hold taut. If I am leashed, however, and my partner lets go while I'm still wearing it, I'll feel distressed.


Being talked down to/degraded/humiliated, including but not limited to:
-Being called names that normally make me flinch. "Slave" doesn't wince and therefore doesn't get me off. Bitch, slut, whore, cunt . . . the usual profanities used to dis-empower women. It doesn't make a difference if I'm feeling more male at the time; being called "faggot" just makes me gleeful.

-Being given orders that include specific sex acts and profanities, ie: "suck my cock, you fucking whore" although that would ideally be accompanied by grabbing my hair and shoving my face into his crotch.

-Being told that I enjoy what is being done/will be done to me, related in graphic detail with name-calling.

-Being ordered to confess the previous.

-Being ordered not to talk, but still being talked at.

-Being told what is going to be done to me in the coming seconds/minutes/hour, related in graphic detail with name-calling.

-Being told that I exist only for my partner(s)'s pleasure and/or the pleasure of others, that I'm just a fuck-toy, etc.